This is me getting married, in 1957
My grand niece is getting married on the 19th
December. She is up to her neck in nuptials related planning – wedding dress,
will it arrive on time? The party after – how many and who? Personal beautification
– nails, hair, face, feet… No wonder she is stressed.
I have never got my
nails ‘done’ in my lifetime. When I was small, Achan clipped my fingernails for
me with a discarded razor blade. I cannot remember suffering an injury in the
process. My hair was ‘cropped’ by a barber in town, until Achan decided to let
it grow long. I looked like a boy and got all the boy roles in school plays
until I was thirteen years old.
I went to hair
stylists after I came to the U K, and my long hair became impossible to wash
and dry daily as in Keralam. Some years later, I started resenting the cost of
chopping off bits of hair here and there, with no discernible improvement in
looks. I have not been to a hair-dresser for many years now. I take my kitchen
scissors to my hair now and then; occasionally my daughter tidies that up a bit,
with a long-suffering grumble.
But my niece is
getting her nails ’done.’ I remembered me dressing up for my wedding:
Wash
early and dry your hair, my aunt instructed. The jasmine won’t like wet hair.
Right. There would be a jasmine fest, I knew that.
An hour
before the ceremony, which took place in our front yard, in front of all our
friends and family, my cousin, Mani, plaited my knee-length hair, grumbling all
the while about it still being wet. She then coiled it up in a kondai
and put a foot-length of a jasmine garland around it.
I dusted some Cuticura powder on
my glistening face, put a red dot on my forehead with a liquid paste, and used
my forefinger to line my eyes with kajal. All done.
Then I wound the Benarasi white-and-gold sari
(the costliest I had ever owned at 105 rupees) round my waist, put a nappy-pin
on my gathers at the waist, and I was ready. The gold thread in the sari gave
my face its glow.
In
India, now, middle-class weddings have become extravagant shows – shows of
influence and wealth on the part of the bride’s family. The ceremony takes
place in a wedding hall, dedicated to weddings. The bride is covered in gold
jewellery and a professional make-up artist dresses her hair and face. There
might even be a manicure and a pedicure. Jesus wept!
My grand
niece is a clever girl – she is keeping a tight hold on the wedding expenses. She
is managing the entire process, with no immediate family to help. I wish I was
there.
This
girl is my friend and a member of my family. I have great faith in her ability
to get things, in the end, right.
